Play
As advice, “relax” is so useless it’s cliché to talk about how bad it is. (I’m going to anyway.)
You can't just relax on queue because "relax" doesn't address the things you're freaking out about. When I'm panicking and thinking about everything that could go wrong, what does "relaxing" do? What are you telling me? Just don’t think about those very real possibilities?
I can't just not think about it. I can't just "let go" of the stress. If I try to push it down, best believe it’s popping back up.
I’ll never relax in the face of mounting anxiety until I actually change something.
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Enter play. Play is a perspective-shifter. It invites you to look at what's in front of you with a new mentality. Don't grind and stress and worry; experiment, and see what happens.
At its heart, play is about letting go and getting curious. You know that big scary thing you have to do? I wonder how cool it's going to be. Let's find out.
I know: it's easy to play when the stakes are low, but what about when real things are on the line?
𝗣𝗹𝗮𝘆 𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗱.
We might be quick to think "play" means take it easy. Play does not mean take it easy. You can play with complete focus and all the energy you can afford. In fact: it's often 𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘪𝘦𝘳 to give something your all while playing. I can attest to that when playing hockey or doing some crazy workout for time. I don't do a single thing with more oomph than those—but I'm absolutely playing. I'm trying to figure out what I'm capable of. I'm curious, and it's fun.
On the flip side: when I’m tense and overly-concerned with meeting expectations, I’m never 100% engaged. My performance suffers because one eye is monitoring my performance.
Play is what we were born to do. We're here to try things. We're here to test boundaries. We're here to learn—what works? What's beautiful? What creates joy?
So whether you're working on your book (me), your album, your sales deck, your court case, your resume, your dog's training (also me)—can you play? Instead of asking, "how might this fail?" can you say, "I wonder how amazing we can do."